Wednesday, August 13, 2008

Gathering Momentum

When confronted with an availability of time I often feel lost, unsure of everything except the fact that I will make a mistake. This feeling is paralyzing, and often, instead of sitting with the discomfort, I fill the time with things that are unimportant to me, things that make me busy again. Things I can use as excuses- oh, I would make something, but I've got XYZ going on. These things keep me from creating the life I'd like because they suck away that empty time. Some of these things LOOK valid from the outside, like volunteering or babysitting, but they don't truly reflect who I am, or who I'd like to become. They are not bad things to do, but are bad when done just to keep me from facing myself.

The thing is, it's really scary to take your life into your own hands and give a try at doing what you really want to do. What if I try and fail? What if I go out and do the things I think I'll like and it turns out I don't like them? What then? Dreams are so much safer up on a shelf in shiny packaging where they can't get dragged through the dirt and muck of everyday life. It's so much easier to fill that time and bemoan my cluttered house and lack of creative life than it is to jump in and risk ruining the shiny dream on the shelf.

So here is my collage to that effect. This collage says, go ahead, give it a try, make your life your own, and make it look and feel the way you'd like. Make the first mistake and get it out of your of the way, you know it'll be so much easier once you've broken this stand still and have got some momentum going...

"All that is needed to break the spell of inertia and frustration is this: act as if it were impossible to fail." ~Dorthea Brande, Writer
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